March, 2009

Monday, March 16, 2009

I am well aware…

Please note that I am well aware I am slacking in my smut duties.  Like all sex writers I have fallen down on the job (no pun intended, but it still made me giggle when I wrote it) and ended up spending too much time talking (and thinking) about feelings.  I admit, I am f’d up.
So here is what is going on lately (or at least some of what is going on).  I had a hippie stuck on my couch for a week.  A (it turned out) heroin-addicted hippie who “borrowed” $30 and who I haven’t heard from to pay it back yet.  grrr.  I know, I know…I was trying to do the karmic-ly appropriate thing.  And the bastard stole my lighters and I think my $30.  But, for those of you concerned I was SO not attracted to him in any way (ick) and it was nice to have someone around to talk to where there was no sexual overtones.

Okay, so it turns out bling dude (remember the emascualated bling dude?) showed up and saw/heard me and hippie chatting on the couch.  Blingie approached me at work and was like, “who is the guy on your couch”.  I said hippie-friend.  He was all offended.

So then, last week I was reading the news.  and there was a sexperiment that apparently went wrong.  A few people commented on it, and one comment that stuck with me was, Jeff Foxworthy is going to have a field day with this one.  I snorted right out loud when I read that.  Anyway, here is the article.  Ladies, read at your own risk, I guaruntee you will smack your knees closed and want to protect your nethers when you read this (a saber saw?!? really? I like some kinky shit but OWWWW!):

Woman Injured in Power Tool Sex Toy EncounterFriday, March 13, 2009

NBC Washington: Some sexual experimentation landed a southern Maryland woman in a hospital with injuries tough to imagine and even more difficult to forget.


Prince George’s Hospital

Maryland State Police airlifted the 27-year-old woman to Prince George’s County Hospital Center early Sunday morning after she was injured in an incident involving a sex toy attached to a saber saw blade, first reported.

The man who called 911 about the incident admitted attaching the sex toy to the saw and then using the high-powered, homemade device on his partner, according to the St. Mary’s County Sheriff’s Office.

The saw cut through the plastic toy and wounded the woman, according to The injuries were severe enough for medevac, but the woman was released from the hospital Monday and is recovering from her unusual injuries.

Investigators talked to the woman, who told them she suffered the injuries during a consensual act and that she and her partner were trying something new and no crime was committed, the sheriff’s office said.

Posted by Haven at 07:04:25

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