Actually, these things are named BANDELETTES and they are marketed as “Inner Thigh Guards” and after reading about their existence I immediately bought three pairs because, well, holy shit! These might be awesome.

I specifically purchased the following:

Bandelettes: Red Romance or as I like to think of them – my slutty red thigh thingies

Bandelettes: Chocolate or, as I like to think of them – my subtle thigh thingies

Bandelettes: Black Unisex or, as I like to think of them – my sporty spice thigh thingies

If  you don’t feel like clicking on the links I can describe these to you pretty well – for the lacey ones: you know those thigh highs we have all owned that are supposed to stay up with no garter belt but never do? Yeah, cut off the hosiery portion and keep the bit of lace at the top and that is what they look like. now the sporty spice ones? yeah, they are more like you cut the legs off of some bike shorts and put them on.

They arrived in the mail today and I had to try them – sure, I’m wearing jeans but I figured it couldn’t hurt to field test the darn things a bit. I put on my sporty spice thigh thingies and then put my jeans back on. They are quite comfortable and hilariously easy to forget that you have them on. So far they have stayed put except for when I went to the bathroom and I pulled off my underwear and in the process ended up taking off my left sporty spice thigh thingy because I treated the bathroom+sporty spice thigh thingies as if they were bike shorts.

Again, this is about 2 hours into wearing the sporty spice ones. I will continue to update but so far, these are kind of awesome. I will be skirting it up all weekend and will let you know what I learn!

…..and I’m back.

I can say the following about bandelettes – they. are. awesome.

They are amazing for many reasons; allow me to detail:

• they do what they say – there is nary a bit of chub-rub even if I am not wearing bike shorts under a skirt. Yes, for the first time in my entire life I can wear a skirt with no underwear (aka bike shorts)! When I wore a skirt with the bandelettes and nothing else I noticed breezes in places I had never felt breezes before which made me sort of stop randomly and cock my head in a confused manner while shopping at home depot (shut up, my life *is* exciting, I swear!)
• they are unexpectedly sexy – okay, so the sporty-spice ones are pretty much just functional, but the lacy ones seem to trip the “thigh high” visual trigger in men. I live in the tropics and although I love dressing up for play time there is just never a good time for nylons here. These bandelettes give me a happy thigh high option while not having to wear the nylon part!
• they do not move. seriously, even though it seems like they should, they don’t.
• the sporty-spice ones fill a gap I was unaware I had (shut up, I know there is a vagina joke in there somewhere! *grin*); you know how casual shorts are getting shorter? The exercise shorts I have bought recently end well above the rub danger zone and although comfortable are not really great to wear while actually exercising. Those sporty-spice bandelettes do not look too weird under sport shorts and by golly, they work really well. 

If I could go back in time to all of the Pennsics and all the other Society for Creative Anachronism events I attended and give myself the gift of bandelettes I would do so in a heartbeat. If you are a skirt or dress wearing person with thighs that may meet and create unfortunate friction – buy these things. I did, and I plan on buying more.

Kisses!
-H.