I am certain there are a million different people with a million different horror stories of how sucky diabetic neuropathy can be. Mine isn’t bad and I am thankful for that every single day. But it is important to remember that even one small Hershey’s kiss sized piece of poop on top of your sundae of life is still some shit in your sundae.
As I lay there I feel it; worse on my left foot than my right.<low buzzing almost electrical zappery> Ugh. Make it stop! so I kick my foot. Didn’t help. Okay, I will listen to an audiobook. That’ll help distract me. . <low buzzing almost electrical zappery now accompanied by an audiobook> I flip. I flop. I kick. I fuss. Finally at about one in the morning, after enough flipping, flopping, kicking, and fussing to irritate even Herbert (diabetic alert dog) off the bed I dig into my bag for a knife and with a growl of rage I grab the toe of my socks and pull it away up away from my toes and cut. it. off. A quick cut to the other sock and with a sigh conveying relief, irritation, and exhaustion I fall asleep within seconds.
I can’t have things touch my toes at night. Not always, sometimes I don’t feel it at all. But when I do—ugh. I now own more toeless socks than toed socks. Should I ever need to wear real shoes this may pose a problem.
Now, you are probably wondering, why not just take the socks off?
Well, because I am weird and my feet get cold and I wake up at 4 am with them aching if they get too cold. Also, it prevents my legs from getting bitten too much by mosquitos because yes, I wear thigh high socks to bed after the toes have been cut off.
So why not wear pants to bed?
Ah, wise question. Turns out that nowadays when I wear pants to bed due to my vast floppery I usually end up tied into an origami nightmare of which there is no escaping.
What is my entire bedtime ensemble you ask?
Ah, that one is easy. But be warned people, it ain’t sexy. Thigh high socks, no toes and bike shorts with a t-shirt. See, now I know you are all trying to make it cute…..it isn’t. But hot damn is it comfortable and for the most part prevents evil mosquitos from snacking on the majority of my body while I sleep.
Okay, toe rant over.