I am attempting to complete an online training course and I have a headache from hell and it is raining. These three items are conspiring to tempt me to curl up under my desk with Herbert the Stinky and take a nap. I would rock a nap right now rather than learning about OSHA standards for electrical safety. **blink**

There is just not enough diet coke in the universe to keep a girl up for this. **big yawn**

In other news I have a continual problem that I don’t know if anyone else has? Basically whenever I manage to shave my legs I invariably miss a stripe on the back of my legs. I have no answer to why this happens or why I only notice it when I am no-where near a razor (at work; at the beach). I wish I was like this one lady I see at the beach who is all
“screw y’all—I don’t shave” and wear a bikini. She has thighburns (like sideburns…but on your thighs) but they aren’t thick or scary. She is so comfortable in her own skin that she doesn’t look weird—yet I miss one stray hair and it annoys the ever loving crap out of me.

To continue along the path of H’s body and how it is annoying her today please let me discuss pants with you. I find pants…challenging. Additionally, I consider skirts to be basically pants because to prevent thigh burn I wear bicycle shorts underneath. So, to summarize: pants = difficult for me. I invariably buy my pants too big. Why? Here is my pop psychology reasoning: when I moved back to the united states at age 17 and was required to go into high school for a senior year…well, my mom had no money. So as I continued to gain weight and my pants got tighter and tighter I recall having heartburn that hurt me so badly I would cry between classes because I knew we couldn’t afford new pants. I wore loose shirts and unbuttoned my pants whenever I could. It was horrible. So I think some part of my mind (and by mind I mean belly) is all “NEVER AGAIN BITCH!” and I get uber big pants. For a little more than 3 years this entire problem was negated by coveralls…they did not constrain the belly, they were comfy, and overall I am a total fan. Large pants were rarely flattering but invariably comfy for sitting in. Recently I have been losing weight…enough to make a sincere size difference and when buying pants I succumbed to the pressure of buying “pants that fit”. So now I have these pants…they look really nice and all but it appears I have developed (am finally showing) that I have a ‘fat pad’ when I sit down. I don’t hate it…but it is a little weird and when I sit for a long time…well, my tummy gets squished by my pants…and I dislike that.

…and thus ends my random story for today. J