May 31, 2011

Posted in Chances are I probably thought it was funny... by

~whiny much?  sorry for that.~

Ya ever walk into work and realize there is so much to do that you short circuit and basically spin in a circle accomplishing nothing and become more frantic and less capable as the day where’s on?

Yeah…that was my day.

It all started with a broken toaster oven, a failed attempt at toasting a bagel using a pan, and giving up and eating ruffles and ice cream (not together–what am I? Insane?) for breakfast.

I stand by the fact that taking mondays off always screws my following week up.

~sigh~

Ah. My blood sugars are high, I’m popping advil like mad, and I’m in a fog. That equals Infection. Where you ask?  My ear. That’s right. My right goddamn ear.

All I wanna do is go to bed. 😦

 

Mmm’kay – update:  much better after a couple days of antibiotics.

May 11, 2011

Posted in Chances are I probably thought it was funny... by

(I have been keeping some stuff “in the can” as they say.  So I am posting them titled the date they were written.  They will probably never be in order.  muah!)

Holy shit.  I’m broke.  Like stupid broke.  Like—put up a paypal button hey folks send me money broke. 

I will be okay.  Or so goes the continued mantra in my head.  Over, and over, and over and over.  In other news, my phone got shut off because I forgot to pay the correct amount of the bill.  Oopsie.I talked my way back into service even though I couldn’t actually afford to pay the entire amount.  That was a fun thing to realize at 2AM when I felt suddenly trapped and alone and unable to call out.  I almost went to work just to have the ability to call someone.  Which I realized was insane and started emailing people instead. 

So much is going on.  The divorce.  I’m throwing a party for a pregnant friend.  The lack of money.  The Divorce.  the amount of information completely random people want in regards to the divorce.  Did I mention I am getting divorced?   When people ask me for the details it fills me with an intense white hot rage of angry.   Here is a quick re-cap – “who’s fault?” besides none of yer damn business the best answer is both of us.  I asked for the divorce.  Yes it is the right decision.  No, neither of us are happy.  No, neither of us are going to be okay for a while.  Ugh…just talking about this is making me ill.  So, moving on. 

Yesterday I finally took a deep breath and answered a bill collector regarding my mortgage which in my infinite wisdom I have been ignoring.  Because if you ignore it; it goes away. 

Heee.  Nope.  it doesn’t.  like all horrifying things in life the more you ignore it the bigger and angrier it becomes. 

In other news—I want thai food.

In other other news – I’ve become obsessed with flossing my teeth.

In other news – my co-worker was becoming a great giant pain in my ass before I realized he was just freaking out.  Similar to the way I am freaking out except he is freaking out in a ‘omg I am going to be a father in like a month and then I have to take some time off and this place is going to fall apart without me or worse it will get better in which case I have just proven my uselessness omg what if my job isn’t here when I come back I am going to be a father holy crap’ kind of way.   Whereas my freak out is more in line with a ‘omg omg omg omg I feel free but poor and I love him but I don’t want to be married to him anymore how much of this debt can I survive oh gods not much but I can’t keep supporting him any longer it is too much it is never going to end and he is never happy no matter what I do and I don’t want to feel unlovable any more why is there no thai food in my world holy crap the work around this place never gets less oh well I am just one person’ kind of way. 

Well, fuck me sideways.  Just had a rousing discussion with a co-worker about the difference between women who dislike women (I can’t ever hang out with women) and men who are overly soliticitous of women.   And then party planning happened and omg I am overwhelmed with crap to do.

Eeeeeek.

And then the epa showed up.  It’s going to be a long-ass day.

Five frozen chickens, two steaks, one catnip and one squeaky toy, and a purple bucket please.

Posted in Chances are I probably thought it was funny... by

So, I was told about this store.  I heard it was a fun insanity of pet food store meets wholesale food distributers.  It was, and it was awesome.  My glee could barely be contained.  I spoke to the employee/manager/owner (?) and placed my meat order while wandering up and down aisles looking at a strange and wonderful mix of 8 gallon buckets of laundry soap, cat food, dog food, bird food tiny bottles of ketchup, and my nemesis of condiments-the premixed mustard and relish (it is NOT good and it IS different- blegh).  The best part of the experience was in the middle of it all were stacks of red garbage cans marked FOREIGN TRASH.  Thankfully, this was not some some scary racist display; it was yet another service this outfit provides to foreign oil tankers. And my “holy crap something else I never thought about before this moment” moment of the day. 
I like days which are not overly exciting; however please understand they don’t always lead to great writing material.

Gack. Snargle. Where does the time go?

Posted in Chances are I probably thought it was funny... by

I have no time.  And it is time I start making some. Since my bladder decided that unless I wanted a very wet bed I needed to WAKE UP RIGHT NOW–I am up.  Could have been sleeping soundly for a good 45 minutes more….but no….. I’m not bitter, why do you ask?
There are so many reasons I haven’t been updating as much as I used to, but none of them are good. Writing is calming for me; if there is one thing I could use, it’s some calm. 
If you are not on my face(palm)book you may not be aware of the shift in animals around my house.  Please allow me to update you (listed by age):
Teak (aka Doodle) – the most aged grumpy bastard in the world.  Same Doodle as always, wants toast, hates the world and wants it to ‘get off his lawn’. 
Life (aka Princapessa, aka Girla, aka Itchy-head) – same big girl as ever. 
Freckles (aka Frex; aka I didn’t name him; aka Oh, Freckles) – it is almost impossible to say his name without an “oh” in front of it.  Because he is klutzy, looooves to eat electronics, and is just a goofey-butt.  Doodle hates him with an extra measure of “get off my lawn”ishness. 
Pratchett – he is a cat and the only one to survive the scourge of George (foster dog who was kind of vicious. I tried; and failed).  What I learned after George was put down is that Pratchett was kind of a survivor and it is possible for cats to have PTSD. 
Phyllis – she is also a cat, and probably the only one I have ever really bonded with.  When I got her she was all creepy looking and had no fur on her bottom half.  From the top-tiny cute kitten; from the bottom creepy naked KILL IT WITH FIRE! something that looked more like a plucked chicken than kitten.  Thankfully her hair has grown back. A wee bit oddly, but back nonetheless. 

So, there be the animals.  They make up a majority of my life.  Recently I have begun feeding them all raw meat as opposed to kibble crap.  They are all apparently thriving and it has not been nearly as gross as it could be.  Although fish-head day left a LOT to be desired. 

This weekend I treated myself to 2 beach days.  This is some insanity; I left my house not once, but twice.  And I enjoyed it greatly.  Collected a bunch of sea glass, napped, chatted with friends.  Unfortunately at the end of Sunday’s relaxing day I accidentally crunched a hermit crab’s house.  I ran around searching for shells for him to choose from (much to everyone’s confusion and “its just a hermit crab” statements).  I just hope he is okay.  All I could think is ‘hurricane heather’ just crushed his house; least I could do is find him a new one. 

So, that’s all I have for now; time to get up and make the donuts (OMG I want a donut!!)